SecondHandPages

Whatever Wednesday- Why I started reading again

Crazy Cat Lady here! This is my first Whatever Wednesday segment, and I am so excited to be a part of it. I am going to hit you hard and fast with my first post.
Up until high school, I read all the time. I distinctly remember locking myself in my room in middle school to read Gossip Girl and The Clique. My dad told me I started reading when I was two years old, and in kindergarten, I even read our large picture book to the class. Safe to say, I have always loved reading. Once I got to high school though, I basically stopped. I decided I wanted to be a “cool kid” and try to fit in. Reading wasn’t cool ok? So I stopped. I mostly hung out with my childhood best friend and she has never been a reader. I lost all desire to read, which is incredibly depressing.
Now, I did read a few books in between the beginning of high school until about 2.5 years ago. I read the entire Twilight series and Ender’s Game. That’s basically the extent of my reading for about 10 years. But then something tragic happened in my life. In September of 2015, my father was admitted to the hospital. He knew the moment he went to the emergency room, he would never come out of the hospital. He was there for a little over 3 weeks, and then he passed away in October of 2015. I was devastated. I knew it was coming, but I was in denial. This was the first real death I’ve experienced. My uncle died when I was in middle school, but I wasn’t close with him. My grandmother also died when I was 18, but she was a terrible human and I wanted nothing to do with her. I didn’t experience any sadness when she passed.
My father passed away in October of 2015, and I had a 5 month old kitten I had adopted from a rescue while my father was in the hospital. That kitten is Meiko! He saved my life. Let’s fast forward. June of 2016, the next tragedy occurs. My grandmother-in-law passes away from colon cancer. My husband’s grandparents have always been better family to me than my own. I was again devastated and so lost. Less than a year, and I lost 2 people I cared about deeply. By this time, Reika has arrived in our lives. I had 2 wonderful felines to comfort me. It wasn’t enough.
Ok so maybe I started reading a little bit in there. I read Throne of Glass after my husband saw it at Barnes & Noble and said it looked like a book I would like. So I read it, I bought the next 2 books, and I started Crown of Midnight. I made it halfway through, and Reika knocked it off the shelf, throwing the bookmark out, and losing my place forever. I illogically gave up. Mental illness does that, sometimes makes you think you can’t continue on with simple things.
My husband’s family came out in March of 2017 to spread my grandmother-in-laws ashes. We had a 2 hour drive, and I didn’t really want to talk on the way. I grabbed Crown of Midnight. Sign, sealed, delivered. In my grief and sorrow, this book lifted me out of my sadness. I know the TOG series has a lot of bad rep. I probably would not be here today (in the book community) if it wasn’t for this series and for Sarah J Maas. It helped me escape, and reminded me that books are an enjoyable escape. So now all I do is read. I basically stopped gaming (sorry hubby) and set challenges for myself. In 2017, starting 3 months late, I read 39 books! I started buying books and finally got myself a library card again. I feel like I can breathe again! Books have helped guide me and helped me understand who I am. I’m not ashamed anymore. I am different, and that is beautiful.
Books AND cats have literally saved my life multiple times. I am so thankful for the book community as well. Maybe one day I will write a book too!
Thank you for joining me for Whatever Wednesday. I promise my posts moving forward won’t be so depressing. Sometimes the story needs to be told, and I hope you all can find some sort of inspiration in this. Stay strong and continue on!